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The Thought Of Inner Fear.

All of us have our own Inner Fears, believes an opinions. These Inner assumptions rule and govern our lives. A suggestion has no power in and of itself. Its power arises from the fact that you accept it mentally.

What would a man at my age have in Fear around his life.. it’s quiet simple.. I have a few in which i’m going to fix a couple in the next shift..I’m doing an eight hour course back up on the Pilbara.. Handling Venom Snakes.. all so what to do if you or one of your work mates get bitten by one with the procedure he docent die on you or becomes very ill.

Im scared just thinking of it crawling over me Lol.

Its funny i don’t fear water, fire or heights, spiders, dogs of all sizes, speed in a car, id say you get the drift.. Id say one of my biggest is going on a date with a lady.. it’s funny if i know the lady well there is not a problem at all as in chatting and haven a good laugh, it’s when i don’t.

So i’m being honest i have had quiet a few dates lined up over the last 6 months with several different women.. ( not saying i’m a stud far from it ) Lol. But what i’m saying is i make excuses and don’t go after a while they move on which is fair enough and no argument with my lips, they shouldn’t hang around waiting for some one that has more excuses than Errol Flynn Hahaha Lol.

Id say having teeth missing, being fat, and an average size man hood could be the problem, with the cover of this book tells all.. as into days society we take the Cover off the book before we open it to read. Hahaha.

I know i have a very great personality as i get told all the time how easy i am to get a long with of all ages, sizes, nationality’s.. Do i use the excuse being on my own for 20 years, no confidence, will she like me, will she think i’m a nice guy..( now we all know nice guy’s come last ) will she like my sense of humour, witness of humour, will she understand my morals and philosophy’s of life, do i come on to strong, or sit too close this can go on and on Lol No wonder i’m on my own just answered it in one paragraph Haha.

I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear... ( Nelson Mandela. )

So i must be humble, be gracious, and make peace with inner fears before stepping out into the limelight for a date and allowing myself to be subjected to all women. Lol.

As i sit here with.. Bob Dylan, Fleetwood Mac, Ben Harper & Tony Joe White.. i really don’t understand were i am with this in my life, i just don’t seem to have the confidence to make that one move in meeting a nice lady.. Or is it believing that i’m just not at a good level with my Inner self, that is creating an Inner Fear through the mental side of my thinking.

Being alone has a power that a very few can handle.

As i sit here in deep thought Haha Scary but it does happen. Is it because i have been on my own for so long i except it, or is it the Fear of being hurt again in life. I believe it’s a lot of a mental behavioural that has built over the last 20 years. But then i have got over the fear of maybe not ever working again with struggling in life as in my future.. which was a big one when you know that no one wants to hire you as you’re over the hill or on the scrap pile as they say because of your age.

I’m insecure but i’m strong.

I’m alone but i’m loved.

I’m Sad but i smile.

I’m broken, but you’ll never know.

To me it’s another part of life i have to conquer with in my self, the mental approach and the belief that when the times right it will happen and I’ll be a very lucky man, that I’ll be a good man with a lot to offer in life for both of us.

Sometimes life is too hard to be alone, and sometimes life is too good to be alone.

That quote i wrote above comes from my heart and the way i look at it in life being alone. As i do feel it’s not to bad being alone it’s pretty good and other days it’s the opposite in life i get down. So as i work with my Inner Fear Of Loneliness and as Manuela gave me the kind words of encouragement.. this is one i need to work with on the mental side of my thinking and the fear of being alone. It will happen in all good course.. i think.. Lol.


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